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Posts from — July 2011

I hope I’m certifiable

Federal Court Interpreter certifiable, that is. This past Tuesday, I finally presented the oral portion of my FCICE. I had identified my weaknesses and strengths and had prepared myself by focusing on my weaknesses and really brushing up on certain interpreting modes. Turns out, I focused too hard on one thing, and ended up neglecting the portions that were my strengths to the point where I’m not entirely sure how I did. :/ I guess I’ll find out in six to eight weeks…

Through the past couple months, I’ve been constantly reminded how lucky I am. I have received constant patience, love, and support from my family and friends. Calls, chats, text messages all full of encouragement and motivation.

Thank you. I never would have made it happily through with my sanity mostly intact if it hadn’t been for all of you… and I appreciate it more than words could ever express.

July 16, 2011   3 Comments

Happy Birthday, Schmoopy

Today (or well, yesterday, now that it’s after midnight) was George’s 32nd birthday. In typical and wonderfully-charmed-life fashion, a short essay he wrote on the final shuttle launch was featured on Jalopnik.(And speaking of “charmed life”, today he got to do what no one gets to do: say goodbye to Atlantis ON THE PAD before she goes…)

It was a great day: I woke up early to prep his presents and make one of his favorite breakfast dishes, eggs benedict, and wow am I glad I did. It took me for-freaking-ever to get the poached eggs right (only one soldier egg was lost in battle). I highly recommend smitten kitchen‘s tips on how to poach a perfect egg, and this amazingly quick (and d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s) recipe for hollandaise sauce. The result (as always, click pics for larger versions):

So delicious. I really hope George enjoyed it, because I’m not really excited on embarking on that little adventure again any time soon. Breakfast should not be that much work!

Tangent! Before going to bed the night before, I was planning this breakfast in my head, so I had a nightmare about it. In my nightmare, Diane (my mother-in-law) and our friend David Precht showed up and demanded plate after plate of eggs benedict. I couldn’t prepare them quickly enough, they got progressively angrier, and George’s birthday ended up being a disaster. (Disclaimer: my mother-in-law is in no way a nightmare — she is, in fact, an angel. I can’t say the same for David Precht, though!)

After doing some yard work/work around the house, we went out to lunch (or rather, were treated to lunch) at Thai Thai by the lovely Maia, along with Frank and his brother, here for tomorrow’s STS-135 launch.

Mmm… bento boxes, how I love thee.

When I got home, I was surprised to find, in usual George fashion, a present for me on his birthday: Pyyyyyrexxxx. (I cannot be the only weirdo who gets excited about kitchen utensils, please tell me I’m not alone.)

All in all, an amazing day for an amazing person.

I love you, babes. Happy Birthday.

July 8, 2011   9 Comments

Paper or plastic?

We are what some might call dirty hippies. (I am?)

TANGENT TIME! Yep, I’m one of those annoying people — we are those annoying people that start using “we” for like, everything once they’re married. Fact is, George and I not only share a lot of the same opinions on The Big Subjects in Life™, but as roommates who get to make out without disappointing our parents by being libertines (yep!), we spend basically all of our free time together. So, yes, I will annoyingly overuse this plural personal pronoun (say that five times fast!), but only because it just makes sense. For us. (heehee See what I did there?)

Anyway! We are what some (though, I hope not a lot of you) might call dirty hippies. Recycling. Composting. Reusing things. Repurposing things. And taking reusable bags with us to the grocery store to eliminate the need for plastic or paper. That said, I respect everyone else’s opinion to disagree. You don’t recycle? I won’t judge you. You don’t reuse? I don’t care if you don’t mind wasting money! You don’t believe in global warming? That’s OK by me!

TANGENT #2! If you don’t believe in global warming because of the really brutally cold winters we’ve been having, let me just stop you in your tracks: “weather” and “climate” are not the same thing. “Global weather” averages out. It’s always raining somewhere, flooding somewhere else and sunny in another region. There is a GLOBAL AVERAGE SEA SURFACE TEMPERATURE, and there’s no denying that with emissions and general mistreatment of the planet, that average is steadily climbing. Global warming causes increased precipitation, increased precipitation causes hail, snow, etc. as well as more violent storms of all types,not to mention longer periods of drought and bigger floods. But, if you don’t believe in it for any other reason than using the temperature/climate/global warming argument, then I’m not going to disagree with you.

Yesterday evening, I pranced on over to Publix for some groceries with my reusable bags in hand. At the register, I handed them to the bag girl and she visibly rolled her eyes. I’m going to assume it was because she was very sleepy and they were dry or because she has some sort of weird new eye-rolling disorder called ocular rotativitis. She started putting away the fruits and vegetables and made the usual comments, “Tee hee, do you eat any normal food?” Lady, that IS normal food. Junk food full of preservatives and artificial coloring is what is not normal. I smiled and checked my Droid and tried tuning her out…

“Why didn’t you put each type of produce into one of those separate plastic bags out there? It’s easier to sort them at home. And they’re free!”

Yes, I didn’t use them because I’m cheap. “It takes the same effort for me to put the stuff in the produce drawer when I get home if the stuff’s in individual bags or not… also, you know, the environment?” I pointed to the reusable bags, indicating that clearly I don’t like additional waste. She ‘harumphs’, finishes bagging, and has a couple things left that don’t fit.

“Paper or plastic for the remaining things?”

“I… can just carry them in the cart.”

“You don’t want to do that with the pineapple,” now she has telepathy? “There are germs all over.”She struck a nerve. I agreed to plastic, figuring I could use the bags for trash. I watched her use two separate bags, one for the pineapple, one to take the eggs out of the bag in which they already were.

“No, that’s fine, I don’t need two. They can go in the same bag.”

“The pineapple will crush them.”

“But I don’t want another bag.”

“But it will crush them. They need their own bag.”

“I don’t want it…” The cashier looked at me with pained, pleading eyes. The people behind me were starting to get impatient. “FINE. FINE.”

I’m sorry, Planet. I tried.

July 6, 2011   16 Comments

Baby Seals

I feel quite blessed to have married someone who has the same quirky, twisted, messed up and dorky brand of humor I thought was matchless. I simply assumed I was doomed to go through life sad every time I giggled because a baby reminded me of a troll doll or someone said “penal code” (yep, I’m that mature).

About a year ago, George and I came up with this animated GIF in our heads. IN OUR HEADS. We never made it a reality, we never saw a similar one, it was never actually real, we would just laugh about it really hard because it was real in our imaginations.

So now, in this most serious and busy time in our lives, at 1am on a Sunday night/Monday morning, what did I decide to do? I decided to make George find me images while I played in Photoshop. And this? This is our brainchild. Our masterpiece. Our magnum opus, I dare say. (Click to enlarge. You know you wanna.)

You’re welcome, Internet. You’re most welcome.

July 4, 2011   7 Comments

I think it’s time to stage an intervention

Hi, my name is Lorenia, and my husband is an addict.

I don’t use the term “addict” lightly — just to make sure you are fully aware of his addiction and will support me when I find the help he needs, let me tell you what happened yesterday…

Our phones occasionally do not register phone calls. I don’t know what it is on George’s phone, but on mine, it happens sometimes when I switch from 3G to WiFi. It’s like my phone just becomes a tiny computer and loses its ability to text or make/receive calls. Yesterday, George was on his way home from work and tried calling me a few times. My phone had been on WiFi, so obviously, no call went through. To him, it appeared that he was calling and it just rang and rang and went straight to voicemail. He knew something must be wrong, because even when I’m mad at him (which I never am, because I am the most patient, even-tempered, kind and sensible woman ever, RIGHT?) I always, always answer (and never with a “Harumph” or a “Yeah, WHAT?” or anything like that, I am sweetness personified, shut uppppp). He began to picture coming home, finding me laying on the floor unconscious, with no pulse, and was brainstorming what to do. Should he carry me to the car and race to the hospital? Should he call the ambulance and wait for them to show up while he embraced me and attempted to resuscitate me? Should he sell the house and get rid of all our shared memories because the pain of remaining here would be too much to bear? (Yes, he actually had these thoughts run through his head. Yes, he actually said as much to me. Think about THAT next time you assume I am the drama queen here.)

Instead of calling a neighbor to have them come over and check I was OK/find my lifeless body being nibbled on by kittens, what did my loving husband do?

I’ll tell you what he did, Internet. He composed, in his head, the tweet he might post for all of you to read in the case of my untimely demise… in 140 characters or less.

“Dear Friends, my beloved wife Lorenia has passed on to the next world. Please, for the love of God, pray for the progress of her soul.”

This is how I know I’m married to a Twitter addict. Let’s find him some help.

Editor’s note: While this post makes him seem kind of silly, that’s obviously because it’s SUPPOSED TO DO SO. I swear George is quite literally a Rocket Scientist.

July 1, 2011   11 Comments